Good Day, Bad Day...Perspective

It is possible for a day to be both good and bad. Despite the frustration of noticing the swelling is back, I have to admit the day was good.
Visited with my in-laws for a bit and went to dinner with some friends. Which was actually a nice change since we usually only go out to dinner alone or with family only.
I got to talk to someone in person other than my husband for a change. I spend so much time at alone I sometimes I forget how much I really enjoy socializing. I mean I know I am a social person, but since I don't work getting to socialize is kind of limited.
So, I can say my day was both a good day and a bad day. It is all about perspective and keeping it positive.

Pull overs...and I don't mean shirts!

So here is the situation, I am following a vehicle in the left lane (passing lane) which had just slowed down because the car in front of them had pulled into the center turn lane. The vehicle in the turn lane was a city cop. The drive in front of me waves to the cop as he passes him but does not speed up to the currently posted speed. The cop pulls out behind me and flips his lights. Now I knew I had not done anything wrong so I am wondering who he is after. I move over to the right lane using my blinker and he follows me. So guess who is after.
I turn on the side street and pull off the road at a safe distance. He comes up to the car and asks for my license and registration. I am still wondering what the hell I have done. So as I hand him my stuff I ask what I had done.
His response floored me: "Ma'am you were tailgating the vehicle in front of you."
Me, in my head, "Tailgating, are you shitting me?"
My retort, "I was what?"
Him: "You were tailgating."
Me: "I'm sorry, did I miss something? The vehicle you are talking about was in the passing lane, correct?"
Him: "Yes Ma'am."
Me: "He was not doing the correct speed and had just slowed because you pulled off into the center lane which then caused me to slow."
Him: "Well, Ma'am the speed limit had just changed."
Me: "Yes and am I wrong in saying he had, had a reasonable amount of time to regain and gain the proper speed for the lane he was traveling in?"
Him: "Yes Ma'am."
Me: "But you pulled me over for tailgating a vehicle which was hindering the flow of traffic?"
Him: "Yes Ma'am. I am going to run your license and will be right back."
Mind you I had just been ranting to myself about the fact the idiot in front of me was not doing the speed limit and I could not get around him. We had not even reached 45 miles per hour and the limit had changed to 55 right before we had slowed because of the lane changing vehicle.
Now when he returns he says: "Ma'am I was going to let you off with a written warning but the printer in my car is not working. Here are your license and registration back."
Me: "Thank you, but may I ask you a question?"
Him: "Yes Ma'am."
Me: "Correct me if I am wrong, but the left lane is the passing lane?"
Him: "Yes Ma'am."
Me: "The vehicle in front of me had a reasonable amount of time to get up to proper speed for the flow of traffic?"
Him: "Yes Ma'am."
Me: "But you pulled me over for tailgating and not him?"
Him: silence...
Me: "Thank you, officer."
Now don't get me wrong I have been pulled over many times for legitimately doing wrong, but this time I was not in the wrong and got pulled when the person who was legitimately in the wrong got off Scott free!!!
I will take my punishment when I know I am in the wrong, however, in this case, I was not in the wrong and feel the only reason the young man pulled me, is because he thought I was a younger person and was going to teach me a lesson. I think he bit off more than he could chew this time.

Driving with the spouse...

How many of you ladies get annoyed with your spouse as a passenger? Most of the time my spouse does the driving because he makes me crazy when he is in the passenger seat. Needless to say, he is a perfectionist.
I find myself getting tense when he is sitting in the passenger seat. It is almost like being a little kid learning to drive with your parent in the passenger seat giving instructions on everything you are doing incorrectly.
This trip was fun even though he was correcting my driving. We were about an hour from home and I had gotten behind two cars who were traveling in the left lane at the same speed as the rest of the lanes. I was getting very frustrated and had seen an option of changing through three lanes to get around the slow drivers. I did not take it because by the time I realized I should have it was too late.
Not to mention I was driving a vehicle which was not mine and much, much larger than my little car. As I followed them I made the comment on the move I would have done in my little car. My husband's response made me laugh so hard it almost brought tears to my eyes. He said, "You better not drive like that, don't make me take your keys away."
Then he started in on the weight of the vehicle I was driving and how it would have been a really bad idea which would cause all kinds of panic in the other drivers.
Now, had my husband been driving he would have avoided the whole scene and gotten around them with no issues. Lessons in driving as you drive, right back in the learning seat after years of driving.
Guess we all need refreshers...

Watering...

It has been cloudy all day but I still went out and did my morning chores of watering the plants. I even watered the grass as my husband had requested because there were some pretty large brown spots. He and I have both worked really hard on the grass to keep it looking healthy and green.
Well wouldn't you know it, it is now pouring down rain. What is it with the weather, get told it isn't going to rain for days, I do my due diligence to keep my plants alive because we aren't supposed to get any rain and now I am concerned they will be over watered. Is it even possible to over water something planted in the ground? I know you can cause root rot in a potted plant, but is it possible when they are in the ground?
It would be so much easier if mother nature would work with me and not against me. However bright side I won't need to water in the morning, so I could actually sleep in. Nah, won't happen. I will have to take some new pictures of the plants. They are really getting big. Even the lettuce is starting to show growth. Soon I will need to get something set up for the cucumbers and zucchini to support the vines.
I have started two new plants, but these are a long shot because I have had the seeds for so long I am not even sure if they will grow or not. The description says it is a vine flowering plant so it changes the idea I had for it when I decided to plant it. Maybe I can make it a bush with training. Of course, it will have to actually grow to make that determination.

1 Week Post-Op

Happy Tuesday all,
Floaters are still faintly there, but getting smaller by the day. The line in my peripheral is still dark, but I am sure it will fade as the floaters have in time.
Vision is still Carnival mirror like, but from being legally blind in the eye previously it is nice to be back to the mirror vision again. Seems weird to be happy about it, but going from the mirror to no visibility was heart breaking. So, to have some vision no matter how distorted it may be I am loving being able to see the colors again and see something in that eye again.
I am keeping my hopes up but am not losing sight of reality. The issue with the veins which originally caused the vision issues are still there and not something they can surgically fix which is why I had been receiving the injections.
And since the doctor(s) (because I have seen three) have no real answer as to why it happened, what caused it to happen. They have no ability to say it won't happen again or the leaking will not come back.
So the reality of this is, the veins are still cracked and not healing, the injection medication keeps them from leaking and allows the eye to do what it should do on its own and reabsorb what has previously leaked. This allows some vision to come back, but it never stays past the decrease of the medication.
However, if the injections are the only way to keep some eye sight in the left eye it is worth the once every three to four months having the needle stuck in my eye.

Veggies...

Well, it has been about a week since I placed the lettuce, cucumbers and single zucchini plant into the ground. Here is a picture of the zucchini and two of the cucumber plants. Then I decided to show you how well the tomatoes are doing.

  

They are thriving and I am so happy, I just might have my own grown salad by the end of Aug. :) The package says 45 to 65 days until harvest so we shall see. The lettuce is still looking really small but I will get pictures of them up soon.
Now, remember the tomato plants were started and grown from a tomato slice without drying or separating the seeds. I simply planted the slice in seedling soil and only about 2 inches below the top, watered it as I notice the soil was not damp and left it alone. Placed the pot in a spot where it got about 6 hours of sunlight per day. Morning and mid day sun.
All of the plants are currently placed in a location to get morning and mid day sun. They seem to be very happy and enjoying themselves. :) I water them every morning.

Post Surgery Update 2

Happy to report the floaters are not only getting smaller, but there are fewer in number as well. The actual vision is clearing up from the fun mirror it was previously. Letters and words are much clearer than they have been in years without the glasses. I am still keeping the font large just to keep from straining until the eye is completely healed.
I am just very pleased even with all the stress and worry things have progressed in the most positive of manners. The truth be told no matter how good a doctor is or how many times the procedure or surgery has been performed there is always room for human error. I am just fortunate there were no errors or hiccups even though I did actually jump at a point in the procedure.
I had a very good surgical team working during my surgery. I am grateful to them and the fantastic job they did.

Soap Box Time...

Today is the one year anniversary of the death of my younger cousin Daniel Travis Nowlin. He was a loving son, brother, cousin, and father but he had an addiction he could not shake. However, that addiction did not make him any less of the person he was to his family and friends.
It just makes me angry how opinionated venomous people seem to think because someone who is an addict makes their loss less important and free reign to bash them whether they know them or not. My cousin, who is his sister posted the other day about the need to find away to stop the epidemic of drug addictions and some guy who seemed to have no ability for empathy decided to get on a soap box and bash users and degrade them as if they were non-human because of their addictions.
I have never had a drug or alcohol addiction, but I still have sympathy and empathy for those who have suffered through the loss of a family member because of these types of additions and I have empathy for those who have the addictions.
No one grows up saying they want to be an addict, it happens slowly and before they know it they are hooked. Do they make the choice to do the drugs, yes. I am by no means naive about the fact it starts out as a choice, but the choice is gone when you are addicted.
I know everyone has their own opinions and thoughts regarding this epidemic, but think before you start on an attack because the person you may be making those comments to may be suffering from the loss of a loved one.
Don't get me wrong, you have every right to your opinion and to voice it, but just think before you spew your venom because you never know who is reading it. Opinion is one thing but venomous spewing is another.
Addicts are still someone's family and they are still a human being, so keep this in mind when you are presented with comments regarding this epidemic.

My Website

Don't forget to check out my website at https://www.simpsondm7071.com/

You can read about my individual books, see examples of my cover art, read about upcoming book events, sales on books and read about how I got started writing.

I try to make sure I give you just enough to wet your reading interest without giving you too much. :) Books can be purchased as paperback copies or Ebooks. If you purchase a paperback copy I will be more than happy to autograph it prior to it being shipped out.

I will ship to any location in the world.  So don't let your location outside the US stop you from ordering. Just take a look and see what reading excitement awaits you.

If you are interested in a cover art design take a look at my portfolio and see if my talent is right for you. You can submit pictures of your own or you can allow my creative mind to choose for you with the description of what you are looking for in the design.

Take the chance and get caught in my web of creation, you will not be sorry! Happy Reading!

Post-Op Appointment

Appointment went great. The eye is healing fabulously. However, I have to say I was completely taken by surprise when they said I had to do a vision test on the eye I just had surgery on. The look I gave the poor nurse had to have basically said, "Are you F'n kidding me?" I took the eye guard and placed it over my nose and began to read the chart lines. To my pleasant surprise even with the fun mirror vision, I made it all the way to line 25 showing I have gone from 20/200 to 20/25 vision in the left eye in less than 24 hours of the surgery.
The doctor is pleased with the healing process and has instructed me to continue using the eye drops for 6 weeks instead of the originally stated 14 days. This is the same eye drops I was talking about costing $425.00 per 1.7 ml bottle. However, I have now gotten the cost for myself down to only $35.00 thanks to the insurance and the pharmaceutical company soaking up the other parts of the costs.
Not scheduled to see the doctor again until Aug 2nd. All in all the past two days have been a move in the right direction and a positive spin towards my vision returning to normal again.
Keep the positive thoughts and prayers coming. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, finally!! :)

Post-Surgery Update

Hello all, I want to start by saying thank you all for the positive thoughts, well wishes, and prayers for everything to go well with the surgery yesterday.
Surgery went very well, no hiccups. It went smoothly and the whole appointment took less time than we were originally told. We were actually only at the hospital for about 3 hours as opposed to the 4 hours we were told.
All the nurses were surprised by my being a patient since they usually deal with patients who are a lot older than I am, so they were all calling me the youngin. It made me laugh.
I was told usually people don't remember the surgery, but I do. Mostly because I am used to the medication they use for the sedation since it is the same medication family as the anxiety medication I take.
I recall seeing the most fascinating bright red, yellow and white colors swirling around making the prettiest shapes. It helped a little to relax me, but then there was a pressure hit which made me jump and I got scolded. Which made them strap my head down to keep it still for the rest of the procedure. I really didn't do it on purpose it startled me and I had no control. :)
There was no actual pain per say, it was just pressure and I think it was caused by the sutures once the lens was placed in my eye. Of course, there has been a scratchy feeling, but have been keeping it at bay with ibuprofen every 4 to 6 hours when I am awake.
Since coming home I have pretty much slept 24 hours waking only long enough to take the ibuprofen and then to go in for the post-op appointment this morning.

It is the day...

Was hoping to have an early appointment, but no I have to wait until after lunch which means no eating from midnight last night until after surgery. Good thing I am used to occasionally only eating once or twice a day.
What is it about being told you can't eat that makes you just want to eat everything and all the food commercials come on tv or across social media...taunting you with what you can't have...UGH!!!
Scheduled to be at the hospital at 1:45 and was told would be there about 4 hours. Mind you have been told the surgery itself will only take 30 minutes and the recovery should only take 30 to 45 minutes. So the rest of the time will be spent sitting around waiting. Hurry up and wait!!!
Happy thoughts!

Eye Drops

Okay, so this just blows my mind. I don't know why it does but it does. For the surgery, I had to start antibiotic drops. Well, I totally missed the set of instructions saying I was to start them three days before the surgery. I finally looked at the summary notes from the doctor today...then I found out my copay for the drops was going to be $145.00 and some change.
It is always a bad sign when the doctor gives you a card to reduce the price of the prescription it is going to be expensive. Fortunately, with the card, I only paid $35.00 for the drops. However, after doing the math the prescription cost a total of $425.00. I about fell over, it was a good thing I was seated and belted into the seat in the car.
Now keep in mind I had not opened the box to see the little vial of evil I was going to have to find a way to put in my eye by myself. I have never been able to put drops in my eye. The eye doctor's assistant always has to hold my eye open when they put the drops in at the office. So I open the box and this is what I find...

a bottle so damn small my computer mouse looks huge next to it. The bottle is 1.7 ml for a whopping price of $425.00 and change. Are you kidding me? Oh well, I only have to purchase two more of these lovely little bottles of evil to do the 14 days after the surgery. It is one drop per day. Luckily I used the card the doctor gave me and will only have to pay $35.00 per bottle. It is still crazy!!
Vent over...for now anyway. :)

Eve of Surgery

The surgery is tomorrow. I will not be online at least for two days. It could be a few more than two though, won't know until after. :(  My nerves being the wreck they are about this whole thing I completely forgot about the instructions to start some eye drops three days prior to the day of surgery.

I am hoping it won't be too much of an issue. I will find out once the doctor replies and hopefully, he won't yell at me too much.

Just to make a few things clear. The doctor visits this month were not for terrible things it is I have more appointments this month than I usually have in a year. I mean as much as I am anxious about the surgery, it is supposed to be a good thing and helpful.

However, I am looking forward to the good thing at the end of all this. Tomorrow's the big day and will get a call today to tell me when I have to be at the hospital for the prepping, then the waiting and then finally the surgery itself.

I have been told they may cover both my eyes to keep the one which was worked on from trying to open because the other eye is open. Guess I will find out tomorrow. Wish me luck and send positive thoughts my way, I will greatly appreciate it.

More Gardening

Silly as it may seem, so excited about my little seedlings. Have been up since 8 this morning, watered all the trees, flowers, and veggie plants. Cleaned the house, missed doing the vacuuming but will get it done tomorrow. Have to get some shims to put under the front of my dress so it sits level. Then have to work on my office/craft room and then the actual office with my computer. I seem to have hit a cleaning phase, I am sure it is due to stress. Whatever the reason, I know the hubby is appreciating the cleaning thing. LOL

Back to the gardening now, I have more sprouts from the seeds. They have gotten taller and the roots for the zucchini are sprouting out the bottom of the holder. I have to decide where to plant the seedlings now. I am thinking the zucchini will be placed in a pot all it's own. Little worried about the cucumbers taking over my tomatoes but they have to be planted.

Aren't they awesome!!!

Four down...two to go

I have to say two doctor appointments a week is just not the best way to spend any month. But the light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter and closer.
The mammogram appointment is complete only had to have one of the pictures retaken. Despite the whole having the breast smashed between cold metal and a piece of plastic to flatten it for the photo, the tech was really fun to talk with.
She had me laughing and I can say I made her laugh too. I am not a shy person so it generally allows those around me to not feel uncomfortable especially in not so comfortable situations.
I am so glad this group of appointments is just about finished. Two more to go and I am good for a few weeks. Surgery is the next appointment then the post op appointment is the very next day. A friend has indicated the pain is the worst the day after but doesn't recall much after then. After the discomfort of the injections, I have been receiving over the past 3 years I am not so concerned about the pain after.
I so wish they were going to be knocking me completely out, but if I am understanding them correctly I will just be sedated but will be awake. Maybe I will get lucky and the sedation will actually knock me out anyway.
So, I will make this request...Fingers crossed I sleep through the whole thing. This is what I would like each of you to think, wish, or pray (your choice) just send thoughts of sleeping through it all.

Gardening Therapy...

YAY, the tomato seedlings I transplanted to the ground have survived. They have grown at least 2 in. since I planted them.
I also started 4 cucumber plants, 2 lettuce plants, and 1 zucchini plant. Three of the cucumber seedlings have sprouted, both lettuce seedlings have sprouted and the zucchini has sprouted. Now I just have to see how fruitful they will all be.
I am also excited to say the Orchid I received as a teacher appreciation gift is sprouting a stem off the main stem. This will be the second one I have not killed and watched continue to thrive. I suppose it was not as though I couldn't actually keep anything alive, I just needed to slow down and follow the directions or actually pay attention to the directions given on how to take care of the plant.
It truly makes me smile to know it all started with a single hydrangea plant I received on Mother's day 4 years ago. I have also gotten it back to the original blue color it was when I received it.
I am hoping this newly found interest will help settle my anxiety or at least give me something to assist in a point to focus myself on redirecting the anxiety in a positive way. A home grown form of therapy.

Binge Watching

Decided since I needed a good distraction since I can't focus visually enough to do any editing I would watch something which takes me to a different world. I have pretty much movied myself out, so I decided to watch a show.

I have binge watched all the shows I wanted to watch or shows suggested to watch and since I had made it through all of those I decided to go back to a show I really enjoy and wish had not ended. Gilmore Girls, so love Gilmore Girls!! I enjoyed the final closing they did, but I don't think they should have ended it the way they did. But I know reality is not always full of perfect endings.

Even though I have already seen all the episodes it is one of those shows I could rewatch multiple times. I really do love this show. If you have never seen this show you should really check it out.

Third one down and more than I thought to go...

Third one down and thought I was getting closer to the end of the doctor tunnel only to have another one thrown into the mix.

Well, luckily this is one I only have to endure once every three years. Yes, Ladies, it is the wonderful mammogram. I really hate having to do this, but for making sure all is healthy it is a necessary evil.

However, the whole idea of the smashing of the boob between two metal shelves is just not appealing in any way you dress it up. But the knowledge of knowing this is a pre-emptive measure to check photographically for any masses which might or couldn't be caught by mere self-exams.

Being someone who has a family history of breast cancer it is always important to have checks and to self-check. Even if you are someone who does not have the family history you should always do the checks and follow up should you question anything you find.

As much as I dread doing these appointments it is very important and should always be done. Always take your health seriously!

Green Thumb

So excited, I transplanted my first tomato plants. Now I just have to hope they survive the transplant. I did everything I knew to do, keeping as much soil around the roots as possible and be as gentle as I could separating them.

I am here to tell you the DIY video about planting a tomato slice to start plants really does work. I will post as they grow. I can't wait to see how big they get. 

Two down

This one was interesting. They measured my eye for the surgery. Technology is amazing. Not sure how it all works, but they took several pictures of my eyes to make the measurements precise for the laser to do its thing on the day of the surgery.
Other than the panic attack due to being told there would be a couple shots given behind my eye for antibiotics it was rather painless. The light flashes left lovely blue flashes for several minutes, but soon disappeared. Just can't wait for the cloud covering my sight to be gone.
Only a little over a week left before I am rid of the cloud covering my sight, despite the removal of the cloud the vision will still not be perfect there is hope even if I have to keep getting injections there the silver lining is I won't have to worry about a cataract in this eye again.

One down...

Lab visit wasn't too terrible. But I still hate needles. Three vials of blood so all in all not bad. I kept my head turned and talked with the lab tech. It is my own distraction tactic. It usually works pretty well, except when the tech gets careless and misses the vain and tries digging the needle around to see if they can hit it before trying again.
Fortunately, this one had the good sense to not try the same arm twice. Still was not pleased with getting stuck twice, but better than it being more. I hate going to the lab because it never fails nine times out of ten I get stuck more than once. But it is a necessary evil to maintain staying in good health or at least the hope of good health.

Life Lessons

I was always told by my grandmother "God only gives you what you can handle." She would tell me even if I think it is hard, what I have been given is to teach me a life lesson and will never be more than I can handle. Now my grandmother has been gone for a very long time but I have never forgotten her words of encouragement and support even when at the time I would just huff at her.
I have asked myself on many occasions what I was supposed to be learning. Why do I need to learn this lesson? Why does it have to be taught in this way? I have never gotten immediate answers and in some cases, I didn't get any answers.
The one thing I have successfully done was survived! I refused to give up, even when at times it was all I wanted to do.
Life wasn't meant to be easy, but damn, does it always have to be so hard? Oh yeah, I am not one to take the easy way even if it is put in front of me.
Right now with the current ongoing lesson, I am really wanting to understand what I am supposed to be learning. Is it to teach me I don't have to be the strong one? Or maybe it is okay to be dependent on someone other than me? Just wish I could know the answer now.
It could very well be a lesson in patience which I do not have and could use. I suppose I could also stand to be less stubborn and strong willed.
Well, whatever the life lesson, known or not, giving up is not an option I will ever choose. Here's to learning and surviving every lesson thrown.