Not having a great day. Lots of fear welling inside. Everything I try to read is blurry. I wanted to do some writing, but when I opened up the document to start all the letters were distorted and blurry. Of course, the tears don't help the blurriness, but I can't seem to stop them.
I try to keep a strong front and positive outlook, but days like today really make it hard to keep a positive outlook. Makes it even harder when I cover the injured eye and the healthy eye is just as blurry. Wearing my glasses only seem to help a little and making the font larger just digs the dagger in a bit deeper.
Ever since the eye thing the fear of losing my sight completely in the one eye. My kids have tried their hardest to keep me from worrying about it by joking with me and teasing me about getting me an eye patch and monocle. I laugh cause I know they are trying to help ease my fears. I also know it won't be the end of the world.
However, days like today scare me and make me think I just might lose my sight completely making me completely dependent on everyone. I have always been a very independent person and self-reliant and the one who always helps everyone else. I am supposed to be the one helping those around me, not the one needing the help.
How do you go from being the helper to being the one helped without losing the independence or yourself?
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