Questions...

Have you ever wondered why you aren't getting the answers you seek?
Have you thought about the questions you are asking?
How about the way you are asking the question?

I realized yesterday while I was sitting in the eye doctor's chair waiting for the numbing drops to take effect so the injection could be administered. As normal the doctor talked, giving me information as he normally did about what to expect and why we were waiting.
Now mind you, I had taken my anxiety medication to help keep me calm during the procedure. Trust me when I tell you, I hated needles before all of this, now I really hate them. However, this injection went as well as the past ones, but I felt the pressure more and heard the click of the injection shooting the steroid pill into my eye, not something I recall ever hearing previously. I actually saw the pill shoot into my eye and float around to it's resting position.
While I sat there recovering and the doctor cleaning up my eye of the iodine and placing antibiotics into my eye to help prevent infection. I asked the right question this time and came away with news which actually gave me the best news I have heard in two years.
I have learned, even though my sight is not back to normal, my eye is actually healing. Several of the spots in my eye which were damaged have actually healed. I guess my previous thoughts of only having three areas of damage which were leaking was incorrect. There were many, not sure of the actual number, however, the knowledge the eye is actually healing like it is supposed to, sets my fears at ease as of now.

So, in hindsight, I realize I have been asking the wrong questions. Now, the right question has finally made its way to the front. This is why I say, if you aren't getting the answers you seek, think about the questions you are asking. Also, think about the answers you are truly seeking.

Get the answers you are looking for, but thinking about the questions needed to get those correct answers.

Eye injection -- number I've lost count

I will make this post tonight because I will be unable to do it tomorrow. I get yet another steroid injection in my eye tomorrow afternoon. The hope is it will bring the swelling down. I know it will bring the swelling down for a little while, however, I know from past experience it won't last for more than 2 months.
Within 30 days from tomorrow, I will go back in for a laser procedure again in the hopes of getting closer to the swelled areas. According to the doctor, his hope is to get as close to the affected areas as possible to potentially trigger the eye to begin to heal like it should naturally.
I continue to hope for the best but have accepted and come to terms with the fact it may not actually work and the vision will remain as is and potentially get worse over time. It is funny in a sickening way to cause damage to fix previous, damage.
I suppose in thinking about it, it is what is done when you renovate a building or landscape a yard. The saying "It gets worse before it gets better." I believe in many things and ways it is true, but in my situation, I think the only way it is going to get better, is by me accepting and making the best of my situation. Being thankful for what I do have and am capable of regardless of small setbacks.
So I say this, always be happy with what you have or have had in your past. Always make a positive out of a negative. Strive for your dreams and never let anyone hold you back. Stand strong in yourself and help those around you be strong with you.

Mother's Day

Today, I sit remembering all the years my children were with me for the day set aside to celebrate being a mom. As tomorrow approaches, I am forced to face this day alone for the first time. My babies aren't babies anymore.
I am very proud of my kids, they have grown into amazing adults. I am by no means going to say it was easy and that we never had hard times. Nor am I going to say I didn't make many mistakes, but through it all, we all made it through.
I give a praised shout out to all the moms I know and all those I don't. Being a mom is the highest honor any of us will every have. No matter what our children do, their success as an adult is because we did our job in teaching them what they needed to succeed.
Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there!!!

To Fail or Not To Fail

I have thought about the word "Fail". Have you ever thought about what the "Fail" means to you?

Failure is something everyone fears at some point or another in their lives. I know I have, I have even accused myself of failing on many occasions. I have fallen down that rabbit hole many times and pulling myself out of it each time.

To Fail = giving up

Not To Fail = Never Quit

Once I found the secret on how not to fail, I don't see any of the negative as a failure, it is a learning process. Not everything is going to come out roses, but everything needs fertilizer to grow and succeed.

As long as you never quit, you will never fail. You may fall, which is the fertilizer, but getting back up is the growth, the success. Small steps, small goals will always gain you great rewards. Never quit, you will never fail. Grow my flowers, grow.

Editing...

I have finally completed the editing redraft of my fist book. I can say editing is very tedious, but it is a necessary evil in the writing process. The time spent writing is the easy part, it is the reread, redraft, and editing that take the real work.
Ever time I run the editing software I hold my breath waiting to see how many errors there are to be corrected. Then comes the hard work of correcting them without finding my story going in a new direction.
Anyone who ever says writing is easy, they have never done it! There is so much more to writing than just putting words to paper.

Air Show fun!!

Spent Saturday with my youngest son and husband watching the Blue Angels. I will post pictures soon, but the show was amazing. I love watching the shows. This is the third air show I have been too in the past 10 years. The second one I attended was a civilian air show and I took my first flying lesson.
I have always found planes fascinating. I love flying in any form, commercial or just watching pilots do what they do best. If you have never experienced an air show I encourage you to go at some point in your life.
I sit on my porch daily and count the planes that fly over my head. Now granted they aren't as close as if I were watching them take off or land and if at an air show. So I say "Bucket List" add air show to it. :)